“If you feel like you don’t fit into the world you inherited it is because you were born to help create a new one.”
― Ross Caligiuri, Dreaming in the Shadows
I found this quote while browsing Google one day and it struck a chord. I was born into a world that I did not quite fit into, and 30+ years later I still often feel that way, as many others like me who have a disability may feel. But I never let it hold me back. If you ask me about my life experiences, they are all about exploring the world through travel and adventure, traveling and exploring different countries and cultures, parasailing over oceans, paragliding off cliffs, co-piloting a plane, cycling across the State of Rhode Island, cycling through the cities of Rome, Italy and NYC. When I want to do something, I do it. I do not allow anyone, or anything stop me. I’m stubborn like that.
How do I accomplish this?
Mentally and emotionally, I am prepared to just be who I want to be. I want to be a pilot, well okay, then I will fly this plane and have a hell of a time doing it!
Physically, I create the world in which I can make it happen. For me, standing and walking are the issues, so I ensure that the adventures I seek include seating, such as cycling.
Which brings me to an experience I am currently trying to cope with. I have a dog, best friend, service animal… named Bella. She has been trained to accompany me, as service dogs generally are. When going for our “walks,” she has been trained to walk beside me as I am pedaling my bicycle (at slow to snail speeds). My balance is quite exceptional on a bicycle, so speed or lack thereof is never an issue. Lately, specifically in Los Angeles, Bella and I have encountered many passersby who are just plain rude, nosey, and vocal about their feelings. I call them UNA’s. I have been given dirty looks, lectured, and even verbally attacked while “walking” with Bella. My response to these occurrences has ranged from embarrassment to anger to hurt (all on extreme emotional levels). I believe it is when I labeled these individuals as UNAs that I finally got a handle on the situation and my emotions were no longer so negative and overpowering.
Why do they attack me? Because I am a girl… on a bike… on the sidewalk. And they are
Unobservant (they do not acknowledge that I have a disability and a service animal)
Nosey (their opinions are unsolicited and intrusive)
A$$holes (because there is a way to be more socially dignified than eye-rolling, smirks, and rude remarks)
Just to clarify some questions that may be rolling around in your mind:
- Am I barreling down the sidewalk knocking people over? No. I am generally moving at the same pace as a walker is.
- Am I in the way of people walking around, near, or with me? No. Most of the time I have one foot on the floor just to provide added comfort to those around me that I will not take off like Lance Armstrong.
- Can’t I just walk in the street (or the bike lane) and avoid all of this? No. Why should I? I am not jogging or cycling like the bike lane folk are. I am walking my dog.
Do you ask a person in a wheelchair to move into the street? Do you ask a person pushing a baby carriage to get
off the sidewalk? Do you ask their 4-year-old child scooting on their scooter to take it to the bike lane? The answer is no… So why should I?
This blog requires interaction. I would like to hear your opinion on the matter. What do you think I should do? If you were me, in my shoes, how would you cope with UNA’s?
Children’s book author, journal maker, teacher, adventurer, Nutella food-tasting manager, and Nutella addict. And yes, I am related. Thanks for visiting – my blog JuiceBox is about my experience growing up and living with a physical disability (cerebral palsy). I intend to give you the juicy details of real life experiences; the hardships, the bullying, how I handled the situation then and, in retrospect, what I should have done. After obtaining my Master’s degree in General & Special Education, I decided that I wanted to help the children of today have a better tomorrow. Read along weekly and interact. I look forward to chatting with you.
I understand your frustration but it may be that some of these people might not see your service dog in time or notice that you have an impediment. They may just see a person on a bike with a dog. Another thing to consider is there are many asses out there who don’t care and ride their bike on sidewalks without an impediment and with little care to who they run over. I would recommend you be a little more patient with others. I was almost run over by someone riding their bike on the sidewalk. He had no service dog. No pardons or apologies. His feet were not down rolling slowly on his bike. He was just inconsiderate riding full speed on the sidewalk. I bet most of those complaining to you are afraid of that guy!